Tuesday, 1 November 2011


I've never claimed to be a socio/aspie/whatever, anything but somewhat fucked up (as I'm sure everybody is in their own way). But I recently realised something, and this may be a completely 'normal' realisation. I realised why I find going clubbing so cathartic: It's so simple.

We're all allowed a moment of self-discovery, I should have realised this awhile ago so I guess this is mine.

Obviously when things like one night stands and “picking up chicks” get involved, it all stops being simple and become humanly complicated, but when it's just dancing, when you are simply following the music, then it's so simple. You don't need to really pay attention to the people around you, and that's what's so enjoyable about it: Being able to be around people, fit in amongst them, and not actually pay more than a cursory attention to them. It's so easy, so simple compared to standard social interaction. Sometimes I wonder if that's what it's like for a normal person 24/7, if it is then I pity them. But as a short-term experience?

Every other aspect of my social life, hell even my hobbies and career, require me to be intellectually on my toes, constantly thinking and plotting. I wouldn't have it any other way. But occasionally, this last link to real humanity is exactly what the doctor ordered for poor emotion-numb me.

Quite frankly, it's cathartic because it's one of the few times Pinocchio can pretend to be a real boy whilst barely even trying.